It’s been a long time coming, but we’ve finally decided to compile a top-five list of the weirdest things sold on eBay. It’s not always clear whether these Internet auctions are jokes, but who cares: Who wouldn’t want to bid on a two-headed plastic baby? So buckle your seatbelts,

and position your cursor over the “buy now” button.

1. The Internet: Billed as a “Trillion-dollar value,” the Internet was put up for sale in 1999 by a seller named “youcanbuytheinternet.” There was one bidder, who offered up $1-million. The offer was not accepted, possibly because, according to eBay rules, the seller would pay the shipping.

2. Imaginary friend: According to the seller, one “olivefam05,” 99 cents could get you Rupert my imaginary friend.” Rupert, the seller went on to explain, “is a little old man with one tooth who lives in the back of my head.” Money won’t help this one…

3. 10 kangaroo scrotums: Apparently, they make for “highly cool novelty coin purses (at $49.50 for the lot). But how many coin purses does one person need?

4. A bright idea: It’s tough to put a price on something like this, but in this case the seller felt the traditional “invention-type” companies couldn’t be trusted with his unspecified brain wave. Unlike the three aforementioned auctions, however, this one generated a number of bids: Two, to be exact. The idea sold for $2.25.

5. Seller’s brain: This may sound rather hare-brained, but the offer to “double your brain power” was actually quite well conceived. After all, who wouldn’t want to harness the power of a brain with a “B.A. from a Top 10 university,” that “Watches an enormous amount of television” and has suffered “No cell damage attributable to mind-altering substances?” Plus, it was “still in sealed, original packaging.

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