Insider is the fake Fake Steve Jobs

Fake out
By now you’ve probably learned that the real writer behind the phenomenally popular Fake Steve Jobs blog is reporter Daniel Lyons. If you didn’t know that, then Insider will take credit for informing you. This article breaks down what you need to know to be a good fake blogger. In essence: do your homework. If you sound like a bombastic loon with a knack for marketing technology, then people will credit you with being a pretty decent imitation of Steve Jobs. If, however, you sound like a fanboy with hate-on for Bill Gates, people will more likely credit you with being Insider. (For the record, Insider doesn’t have a hate-on for Bill Gates, it just seems that way sometimes.)

No one has ever bothered to try to reveal the true identity of Insider, which leads me to believe I need to start impersonating more wankers who happen to be successful IT CEOs.

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Internet not safe: report
A bunch of old people in the U.K. have finally woken up to the idea that the Internet is a potentially bad place. Sure, they’re about 15 years too late with that epiphany, but better late than never, I guess.

The House of Lords, typically composed of men with one foot in the grave and beetroots for brains, have prepared a report calling the Web a “Wild, Wild West” (WWW, get it????) where criminals run free and innocent people are bilked out of their pensions. What this report is designed to do is somewhat beyond my ken, but among its recommendations are a new Cyberpolice department where people can report Internet-based crimes. Call me nuts, but I think that already exists. Unless, of course, they’re referring to a new race of crime-fighting cyberbeings who inhabit the Internet as shadowy beings composed only of binary code – in which case I fully endorse this report.

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Hello? Halo 3?
Halo 3 is selling out all over the place, which is news to Insider seeing as it doesn’t actually exist yet. The game, which should be coming soon to an Xbox console near you, has presold a million copies, leaving me to believe that people think it will kick some ass (a fair assumption given the first two Halos) or they are still having trouble buying an iPhone and just want to be able to purchase something that’s been through the hype machine. Either way, Microsoft is filling the coffers. Take note, Sony.

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Jim Love, Chief Content Officer, IT World Canada

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