Horoscope: Mainframe is on last legs, Scorpio

Chris Tilbal is not a certified astrologer; he’s just a guy who sometimes gets a vibe. The horoscope appears on the last Friday of every month.

Horoscope for November, 2002:

ARIES (March 21-April 20): Supercomputing project demands major recruiting effort. Colleague avoids

eye contact after embarassing mistake. Application compatibility remains elusive.

TAURUS (April 21 – May 21): Virtual meeting puts the necessary distance between feuding team members. Direct marketing campaign hits roadblock after comments from chief privacy officer. File-sharing tool makes you hero of disorganized departments.

GEMINI (May 21-June 21): Switch to Itanium on workstation project prompts embarassing call from Sun sales rep. A normally adversarial board member acts surprisingly encouraging in off-site session. Let go of your J2EE obsession.

CANCER (June 22-July 22): Supervisor likes to play devil’s advocate; don’t allow yourself to feel threatened. Online customer relationship management tools overwhelm help desk with support calls. New cell phone plan looks attractive.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 23): Only you can make the business case for sales force automation project. Office secret won’t stay that way for long. Web services tutorial clears up nagging questions.

VIRGO (Aug. 24-Sept. 23): Scoping out WLAN development leaves you torn between carrier partners. Hostility from user is dissipated once CEO enters the picture. Stock up on layer 3 switches.

LIBRA (Sept. 24-Oct. 23): Marketing exec’s ad campaign ideas have all the realism of a Steven Spielberg film. CFO’s funding reallocation puts the money right where you want it. Outsourced applicaiton development has never looked better.

SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22): Even the most powerful mainframes need to be replaced once in a while. Project manager flip-flops at critical juncture. A notebook is put to an unlikely use on an airplane.

SAGGITARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec. 21): Authentication tools put committee’s fears to rest. You hunger for additional bandwidth — join the club. Reseller relationship pays off in handsome rebates.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 20): A software pilot is only a pilot — don’t get railroaded into something you’re not prepared to do. Praise comes your way when re-install is avoided. This is a good time to reorganize manuals.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 21-Feb. 18): Flat-panel purchase can’t be justified. You didn’t know what you were getting into by volunteering on standards body. For once, CEO acts like someone you could look up to.

PISCES (Feb. 19-Mar. 20): More programming, less gossiping. Off-shore opportunity has hidden pitfalls. If only your GPS could help you find your sanity.

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Jim Love, Chief Content Officer, IT World Canada

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