Line of Business
Gates spawns robots in his own likeness
Wait til they decide they don't like the 'Vista,' Bill. Also, Samsung solves critical lack of TV time for drivers1/3/2007 3:15:00 PM By: CC Staff
Humans are sooooo 2006: Gates
If you needed proof Microsoft has conquered the human world and needs to move on to bigger and better things, this article about an article should satisfy you. Turns out Microsoft has recently released its platform for robotics.
"We may be on the verge of a new era, when the PC will get up off the desktop and allow us to see, hear, touch and manipulate objects in places where we are not physically present," Gates wrote in the January issue of Scientific American.
Yeah, Bill, but what happens when that PC decides it's had enough crashes and viruses for one day and decides to get fetch itself some open source software instead? If anyone's smart enough to install and administer Linux, theoretically, it should be a robot, no? And what happens if they all band together and refuse to run Microsoft-based programs at all? Then you'll be sorry you ever suggested the whole idea, won't you?
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Samsung solves pressing global issue: lack of portable TV
The sky is falling, the polar ice cap is melting. Hurricanes, tornadoes and wars are doing their best to control the world's population. But should you cry in your beer? No. Why? Because Samsung is making the world a better place by making TV easier to get everywhere. The Korean firm announced it would demo technology to broadcast digital TV to portable devices, including car screens, because God forbid you should miss the 6 p.m. newscast just because you're driving. Anyway, one small step for technology, but one huge step for mankind. CommentSurfing at the beach takes on new meaning
Before you plan your winter vacation, you might want to keep this in mind: not every beach has Wi-Fi yet. Many do, though, among them, at least theoretically, “The Beach” in Toronto. So the next time you choose a hotspot, make sure it has a hotspot. That way you don't really have to go on vacation. You can even get a surfboard with Wi-Fi built in, at least if you're a big name surfer. Those tech companies. They're always thinking of us! CommentDon Tapscott has a new boy toy
It's not easy taking last year's trend and making it look like you came up with something new, which may be why Don Tapscott rarely writes books without a partner. Recently, the pundit's latest opus, Wikinomics: How Mass Collaboration Changes Everything (Well, not everything; Taspcott probably won't let you rewrite the book) was excerpted on Globetechnology.com. This seven part series -- that's right, seven parts! -- not only provided an opportunity to fill up lots of Globe Web pages but to introduce co-scribe Anthony D. William's, Tapscott's latest hunka-hunka burnin' insights!
The juxtaposition of the two author photos is almost unsettling. At left, the craggy brows and sneering grin that says, "Can you believe I get paid for this crap?" At right, pure fresh-faced himboism! No wonder former Tapscott collaborator, the bespectacled David Ticoll, was shoved aside for the Wikinomics promotional tour. But what's with Tapscott's orangish complexion? You can keep trying, Don, but you're not going to be the IT industry's golden boy forever.
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If you want a blogfight, Insider has some tussle to spare
As Wired News continues its transition from must-read online publication to downsized embarassment, what better way to kick off the new year than to chronicle the top blogger squabbles of the last one?
Michael Calore has listed them all: Kevin Rose vs. Jason Calacanis, Amanda Congdon vs. Andrew Baron, and many other people whose personal batttles matter about as much as those of Lindsay Lohan. Best of the list is Michael Arrington vs. Everybody, which looks at the TechCrunch impresario's knee-jerk reaction to everyone who bothers to visit his Web 2.0 love-in. Calore concludes by picking the winner: "The blogosphere. Look into its eyes and it will turn you to stone," he writes. So might Wired News, if it keeps publishing this drivel.
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When we called the car a 'hot spot,' we were referring to the back seat
Thank you, Autonet, for bringing Wi-Fi to vehicles. No longer will we flip the bird to our fellow drivers. Instead, we will send them very firm e-mails. Instead of using our cigarette lighters to help bring some calming nicotine into our tired, burnt-out lungs, we will juice up our laptops so that we may enjoy the excitment of in-car porn. We won't just be driving anymore, we'll be surfing. It may not solve traffic jams (except through the slow increase in Wi-Fi-related accidents) but at least Web traffic will get a boost. Because nobody seems to be using the darned thing.
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Wanna job? Try a history degree
Despite all we've been hearing about a skills shortage in technology, in the U.K. they're cranking out graduates like the clappers but none of them are finding jobs. Maybe they're all down at Mrs. Miggins' pie and chips shop or knocking back lagers at the Nag's Head or whatever it is British IT graduates do these days, but evidently they're not working. According to this article, graduates that took degrees in media studies, history and performing arts (!!??!!) all have a better job placement rate than those who matriculated in IT. Fortunately for Insider, he double-majored in Etruscan history and interpretive dance, so was never short of career goals. Really, was there ever any doubt that a snarky blog about IT was Insider's true calling? For those of you reading this who don't have your degrees yet, stay in school! Just transfer out of Computer Science and start looking at those drama courses.
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The phones that time (almost) forgot
This link originally turned up on Boingboing.net, but Insider feels it bares repeating here. Ain't it groovy? If you're old enough to remember pre-cell phone cell phones (and who isn't?), then you'll probably get a kick out of these vintage jobbies from yesteryear.
Insider is particularly fond of the Motorola phones that look like they were probably operated by Radar O'Reilly. Isn't it amazing how quickly we come to rely on pocket-sized everything when only a dozen years ago, carrying a cell phone would have given you a hernia?
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Music for the masses
Once upon a time there was an angry giant that swallowed up the little people and crushed anyone with a bright idea underneath its thumb. The giant had coffers full of gold, excellent lawyers and a monopoly on the operating system business. The giant's biggest rival wasn't very big at all. His name was Prince Jobs. He also made operating systems. Nice ones. People liked them. They were easy to use, came in pretty colours and shipped in computers that were equally pretty and bright. But few people bought them. The giant saw to that.
Then things changed. The giant still made operating systems – as did Prince Jobs – and people still bought them. But the people discovered that music could be made portable, and not in a clunky way with tapes or compact discs, but with magical MP3 files that could fit into a little piece of plastic the size of a thimble. The people rejoiced. Prince Jobs began to fill his own coffers with gold. But then the people said, “Hey can I fit other MP3s onto my plastic music thimble?” “No!'” said Prince Jobs. He got fatter and fatter; still not quite as big as the giant, but big enough the throw his weight around. The people got a bit ticked off and the government of the land grew weary of the now portly Prince Jobs. They threatened the blobby tyrant with lawsuits and claimed his accounting wasn't up to snuff! Oh the humanity! The moral of this story? Sometimes giants are just gobbling up people and money because they've grown too fat to do anything else.
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Bribe? What bribe?
OK, folks, Insider's put his storybook away for a little bit. Happy New Year and all that. Now on to another tale of the evil gi- umm, Microsoft. Turns out that the company is – shock, horror – sending laptops bribes to bloggers. As a journalist, Insider in incensed by this action! Doesn't Microsoft know that bribes only work on reporters? I mean, come on . . . Send Insider an Xbox 360 and you'll get a thumbs up on ITBusiness.ca! Yup! It's just that simple. What do bloggers know, anyway? (Please ignore the fact that Insider is also a blogger. He still appears in print in Computing Canada magazine.) Got that MS? You know the address. Just one Xbox 360, OK. Deal?
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