A Toronto man reports that he successfully updated his iPhone 4S to the new version of Apple’s iOS software without complaining even once on social media.

Kelvin Macintosh, 30, says he saw the update was available in his settings menu and chose to update it, making sure his iPhone was plugged in to a power source first. The update downloaded and installed in an acceptable amount of time, he felt, and he thought the new user interface presented in iOS 7 was fine too. Most of his apps worked with the new update, and he’s sure updates will soon be applied to other apps that aren’t working – and if not, whatever.

“Updating the software on my smartphone didn’t cause my emotions to stir whatsoever and gave me no reason to feel I needed to share anguish with my friends and peers on social media,” he says. “This new iOS version seems OK, I mean it’s just the same software with a few interface tweaks so it’s not like my head is going to explode.”

While his iPhone was out of commission downloading and installing the update, Macintosh says he made a cup of tea and read a blog about the changes in the new mobile operating system. Then he did some productive things like whatever his job is. The tactic of distracting himself with other things in the world that were not related to his iPhone prevented Macintosh from rushing to Facebook and wasting his time to write some whiny, annoying complaint about the process “taking forever.”

“I’m not really sure how long it took to install, I just started the process and came back to it later when it was done,” he reports. “I sort of forgot I’d even started the update, it’s not a big deal.”

After using his new phone with iOS 7 for almost a full day, Macintosh says he didn’t even post to Google+ about how the phone’s new design was not to his liking. The brighter and more colourful design didn’t “hurt his eyes” even once, he says.

“Probably in a month I’ll have forgotten that it’s really different at all and just get on with my life,” he adds.

Macintosh reports that when he was faced with the conundrum of how to work the new multi-tasking feature in iOS 7, instead of taking to Twitter to express outrage about the change causing him five seconds of consternation, he just figured out how the new system worked and started using it.

While he didn’t lose his contacts as a result of the upgrade, Macintosh says that wouldn’t be a problem anyway because he always backs them up with iCloud and when he syncs with iTunes on his laptop.

While Macintosh was pursuing a high score in one iOS game, Tap Tap Angry Cobra Madness, and that game currently isn’t compatible with iOS 7, he reports feeling no injustice has been perpetrated. He’ll probably just start reading while he’s riding the bus to work, or install some new game to pass the time.

“I only got a smartphone a couple of years ago,” he points out. “Before then, my life was fine without even having one.”

 

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  • radecki

    Awesome article. Of course I found this on Facebook while ranting that some small child had stolen my iPhone and put a Windows 8 child’s interface on it.

  • Yup. It’s really awesome. And I think the people are loving the new iOS and definitely liked all the new things about the new operating system and it improved.

  • EricH

    I didn’t realize this was a humour column. 😉 Excellent article, though! Something people often forget: There is more to life than their i/smart/super/cellphone!

  • Adam

    Funny article, however, these are thousand dollar devices which people use every day. Of course they’re going to care when Apple designers take a 90s inspired, neon crap all over them. Did you really want to spend 15 minutes learning how to close an app again? Nobody does.

    • philandrew

      it took you 15 minutes to learn to swipe up to close an app? are you stupid?